There is something immediately inspiring and terrifying about getting good advice.
I recently participated in a webinar hosted by the fabulous Book Doctors, a course offered to NaNoWriMo participants. So much of what they said made me want to stop everything and pound the keys--get back to work on editing my novel. I felt inspired.
Alas, when I actually did sit down with it, the imperfections were now magnified into elephants and the enormity of the task in front of me unfurled in a moment of terror and disillusionment.
We are strange creatures, artists. There is always this battle of striving for perfection against the feelings of self-doubt.
At one point during the webinar, David Henry Sterry said, he sometimes does something like 70 edits for a book. What?! On the one hand, it's easy to feel dwarfed by that number...here I am on my first...
On the other, it reminds me that no matter how much of a professional, no matter how many books you've written, we all start with the same rough, gnarly, barely readable draft, that must be polished into something beautiful. It may not be easy, or fast, but there is a clear process, there are footpaths to follow through the darkness.
At a recent trip to Barnes and Noble, I browsed the journal section for a new companion:
Oh Hello, Universe, thanks for the reminder...
After I got home and opened it up, I found an extra little surprise on the inside cover.
"You are the Sunshine_____ Be Proud! You have helped us donate 240,000 workbooks and 44,000 pens to children around the world. Ecojot is paper with a cause, sustainable, B-certified and made in Canada. B the change."
Lovely! A Ralph Waldo Emerson quote has never steered me wrong.
Did a third edit of my entire first chapter this morning, and my new journal will accompany me to my SCBWI writer's conference this weekend!
Showing posts with label NaNoWriMo. Show all posts
Showing posts with label NaNoWriMo. Show all posts
Monday, February 17, 2014
Monday, October 21, 2013
Left-Brain Push-ups
It's that time again!
November is right around the corner, and part of my lack of blog updates lately has been because I've thrown myself full force into the outlining process as prep for NanoWriMo. It's been an interesting learning experience. I've never done an outline before. I mean, I remember doing them in middle and high school English class, but that's about it. Once I wasn't required to do them, I never did. I never had any problems with this before. I always much preferred to jump in and write, get messy, and then clean it up later. For a ten page paper, a short story, or poem, this method works great and served me well through four years of college. It took me four years of NanoWriMo, however, to realize that this same strategy wouldn't work for writing a novel. Don't get me wrong, a first-draft, fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants method is lots of fun (at least for me) and there is a place for it. It helps me work though problems, figure out important plot points, and get to know my characters in a way that is liberating, without my inner editor or critic running the shots. At the end of the month though, I would look back at my 50,000 + words with a deep despair, as the thought of trying to edit was overwhelming. It felt like trying to turn a finger painting into a Michelangelo. I finally realized that if I wanted to actually COMPLETE a novel, and not just a first draft, I would need to put a more serious plan in place. With the help of some good books that helped to dispel some misconceptions and also give me a guide to work from, I decided that this year, I would finally do an outline.
There's a reason that outlining doesn't come naturally to me, I am primarily a right brain thinker. The right side is usually associated with creativity, abstraction, and emotion, while the left brain deals in more logical, sequential, and linear thought. Though I've always known that I favored my right side, I recently took a test that confirmed it down to the percentage. Not only that, it broke down all of the specific functions and highlighted my strengths and weaknesses.
The more I get to know myself, the more I am able to figure out the things that are blocking me, which gives me a road map to the solution. Though some people tend to favor a certain side of their brain, there are actually things you can do to strengthen your less functioning parts. The brain is like a muscle, and the more you exercise, the more those synapses fall into place.
So I've been doing left brain push-ups. Making and checking off lists, organizing notes (color-coding helps for right brained people since color is processed in the right hemisphere), and turning off my automatic spell-check--I actually have to manually go back to a misspelled word and write it out again, try and figure out the real spelling without getting a list of options or an automatic change...try it, it's tougher than it sounds! (unless of course you are a spelling champ...you lucky left brainers!)
My husband started running last week. He was never a runner, but in just a little over a week he's running at least 2 miles every night! I don't know if my progress has been that extraordinary, but it sure seemed like running a mile at first. The more I do it though, the easier it gets, the more miles I can go. Now, with less than two weeks to go before the official start of Nanowrimo, I am actually..dare I say it...enjoying the outlining process and am looking forward to reaping the rewards of my hard work in November.
Friday, April 26, 2013
Fiction Friday: Chapter One, Part 3
Prologue
Skander managed to avoid Imogene the rest of the day, but it wasn’t easy. Everywhere he looked she seemed to hover. He would hear her voice in the hall and quickly duck around the corner. Somehow she managed to be in every one of his classes, and even when she was looking away, it was as if he could feel her eyes, searing, knowing, watching. He thought his display during first period would have done the trick, but she was persistent...or stupid.
At lunch, he settled into his favorite spot. A picnic table under a tall spruce tree. It dropped little seedling pods that exploded on the ground and the table. One fell on his shoulder as he rummaged through his bag to find the apple he had stashed that morning. He could easily take something from the cafeteria, but he didn't want to risk that Imogene might see him. He couldn't explain why she made him nervous, after all, she should be the one afraid of him, everyone else was.
A blue bird flew down from a branch and landed in front of him on the table. He watched it jerk its head from side to side and bounce up and down on nimble claws. He thought of his wooden bird and tried to record the blue bird’s movements in his mind so that he could recall it later. The bird flew off again, and as he watched it go, he saw Imogene making a beeline to the table, her keychains bouncing with each sure-footed stride.Time to go. He grabbed his backpack and swung himself over the fence. No more shadow games today, he thought. It was only about an hour before he usually gave up and went home early anyway.
Back on main street, the morning fog had rolled down from the mountains as if the clouds had just given up and decided to take a nap right there in town. He breathed in humid air and started his ascent. Back at the spruce tree, perched precariously on a high limb, Imogene watched. Her eyes, sharp and focused, as Skander made his way through the faux cobblestone streets to where the pavement became gravel, then, gravel became dirt. A cloud of dust and fog trailed behind as he climbed. Higher, up the road that only lead to one place. The yellow Victorian at the top of the hill seemed to tremble as he opened the door and stepped inside.
Chapter One, Part Three
Skander managed to avoid Imogene the rest of the day, but it wasn’t easy. Everywhere he looked she seemed to hover. He would hear her voice in the hall and quickly duck around the corner. Somehow she managed to be in every one of his classes, and even when she was looking away, it was as if he could feel her eyes, searing, knowing, watching. He thought his display during first period would have done the trick, but she was persistent...or stupid.
At lunch, he settled into his favorite spot. A picnic table under a tall spruce tree. It dropped little seedling pods that exploded on the ground and the table. One fell on his shoulder as he rummaged through his bag to find the apple he had stashed that morning. He could easily take something from the cafeteria, but he didn't want to risk that Imogene might see him. He couldn't explain why she made him nervous, after all, she should be the one afraid of him, everyone else was.
A blue bird flew down from a branch and landed in front of him on the table. He watched it jerk its head from side to side and bounce up and down on nimble claws. He thought of his wooden bird and tried to record the blue bird’s movements in his mind so that he could recall it later. The bird flew off again, and as he watched it go, he saw Imogene making a beeline to the table, her keychains bouncing with each sure-footed stride.Time to go. He grabbed his backpack and swung himself over the fence. No more shadow games today, he thought. It was only about an hour before he usually gave up and went home early anyway.
Back on main street, the morning fog had rolled down from the mountains as if the clouds had just given up and decided to take a nap right there in town. He breathed in humid air and started his ascent. Back at the spruce tree, perched precariously on a high limb, Imogene watched. Her eyes, sharp and focused, as Skander made his way through the faux cobblestone streets to where the pavement became gravel, then, gravel became dirt. A cloud of dust and fog trailed behind as he climbed. Higher, up the road that only lead to one place. The yellow Victorian at the top of the hill seemed to tremble as he opened the door and stepped inside.
Author's notes: This is the last official Friday of Camp NaNoWriMo, but I will try to keep the Fiction Friday thing going as much as I can. It's been good for me to have this weekly deadline, and even though I didn't get as far as I wanted to, it's still more than I had before I started! Thanks to anyone who has been reading, thanks for hanging in there with me through this little experiment. I'll get back to doing more regular (non-fiction!) posts next week. Have a great weekend.
Friday, April 19, 2013
Fiction Friday: Chapter One Continued
Chapter One Continued
A girl with dirty blond hair woven in tight ringlets, and clear blue eyes, stood in the doorway. She wore baggy jeans with holes in them, and a ”Blink 182” t-shirt. Her eyes darted around the room as if looking for something. Plastic key chains hanging from the zippers on her back pack clanked together as she turned to face Miss Farrow.
“Hi” she said in a sweet, high pitched voice, “I’m Imogene, I just moved here...well, really I’ve been here for awhile, but this is my first day of school.” She giggled. Miss Farrow nodded, but before she could speak Imogene continued, “Thanks so much for having me, I’ll just find my own seat...sorry to disturb you...”
She stared straight at Skander and flashed her white teeth. He scowled as she made her way down the aisle. Twenty students arched their necks to watch as she took one of the three empty seats next to him. Imogene ignored her wide-eyed, open-mouthed classmates, as she lifted her backpack up onto the desk. The keychains banged against the metal, she hummed as she sorted through her books and papers.
Skander noticed patches of fabric shrewdly sewn onto the bag displaying words like, “cool”, and “girl power”, and other words that looked like bands he had never heard of.
“I hope you don’t mind” she said, “this spot seemed cozy.” she giggled again, which made Skander cringe. This would not do. The rest of the class was still staring at them, even Miss Farrow seemed transfixed. As much as he hated the idea of sharing his personal space, being the center of attention was worse. He grunted in reply and turned his attention back to the carving.
There was a unified sigh of relief as everyone turned back towards the front of the room. Miss Farrow snapped out of her comma, “welcome Imogene, glad to have you”. Imogene nodded, still smiling.
Skander bent low over the desk, portioning off his space and shielding the view of the intruder to his left. He looked down at his work with a frown. The new girl’s entrance had caused his hand to slip and now there was a line straight across where the bird’s eye should be. Maybe if he made a few adjustments he could make it look like a feather...
“That’s beautiful!” Imogene had leaned over to whisper. Skander was jerked out of his thoughts again, and grasped his knife with white knuckles. He tried his best “shut-up-and-leave-me-alone” glare, but she just beamed back at him as if there was a force field blocking all obvious social cues. The girl was seriously dense.
With one efficient swipe, Skander slashed his knife across the top of his forehead, severing about three inches of black tresses. He let the hair fall to the ground as he watched her blink, the corners of her mouth slowly dropped. Satisfied, he turned back towards his desk and breathed in the dry, earthy, musk of oak.
Author's Note: I don't know if anyone is actually reading this, if so, Thank you, and... I'm sorry! I really wanted to have more up today...I have a great ending to this chapter...at least in my head...but it's not up to the level that I feel comfortable posting yet. This is a work in progress for me. The fact that I'm posting things at all is a huge step. I used to never let anyone read anything I wrote until it was finished. Until it was PERFECT. but you know what? That's how you end up being an author of a book that no one ever reads. One thing I love about NanoWriMo is that it lets you turn off the "editing" brain and just write. That has been totally freeing for me. But now, inviting the editor back in is a tricky process. I love shaping and molding the rough edges into something beautiful, I even like searching for the perfect word and going "ah ha!" after taking out a comma. But my editor brain is like a mouse...if you give him a cookie...well, you know the story. All of a sudden he starts second guessing everything, and the thoughts creep in, "this isn't good enough", "What was I thinking?", "everyone is going to hate it!" (He's a bit melodramatic). The "Pantser" in me (that's "fly by the seat of your pants" as we call it), that I learned to trust in NanoWriMo, is learning to give over control to the editor...but I keep her around for when mr. editor starts to get too carried away. She reminds me of what it's all about, the sheer joy of telling a story.
p.s. I know this makes me sound like I have multiple personality disorder, but if you know many writers or are one yourself...it probably doesn't seem all that strange.
Friday, April 12, 2013
Fiction Friday: Chapter One (part one)
Prologue
15 years later...
Skander Malvado sat at the wobbly cafe table outside of “Aunt Edda’s Bakery”, stacking creamer cups into a tower and jabbing toothpicks on the top and sides. A white stream trickled onto the table from the crude miniature fountain. The girl at the next table, a blond that he recognized from school, glanced at the river of cream on the ground and followed it to the tip of Skandar’s black combat boots before quickly averting her gaze. Skander rolled his eyes and let the tiniest of smiles flash across his face. She looked at her watch and gathered her things together. He heard the bells from a block away, signaling the start of school. She could make it if she ran.
Skander watched for a few minutes, then knocked over the tower of creamer and got up without paying, leaving a half eaten sandwich and ten empty creamers in a puddle of white. The waitress scrambled to her feet, but didn't object to him skipping out on the check. She mopped up the mess and hurried to get out of his way, almost tripping over the chair as he stalked past.
He strode down the cobblestone on main street at a casual pace. They were the kind of stone that were made to look old, but were clearly very new with their perfectly rounded edges and shining finish. that’s the way most of the town was. He walked past mailboxes, houses, lawns, all glinting in the sun, showing off their brand new price tags. He often thought how strange it was for a street. a house, a town, to be the same age or younger than he was. When the town rebuilt after the storm, they had tried to replicate the old styles, but with all new materials and modern finishes, it looked more like a disneyland version rather than a restoration.
Fifteen years. It was as if every inch he grew, another brick was added. They had grown up together, he and Shadow Lakes. He could almost match his breath to the swaying of the freshly planted trees. The tops of which were barely taller than he was. That, and the fact that his mother was probably the most powerful person in town, it wasn’t surprising he felt above it all.
By the time he reached the school, the courtyard was empty and all of the hallways quiet. The principal was talking to a janitor as he rounded the corner to his first period class. Mr. Hardy was poised at the sound of footsteps, and got halfway through the word “hallpass” before seeing who it was. He quickly turned back toward the janitor and away from any possible eye contact. Skander never even slowed his step.
There was a brief moment of recognition when he opened the door to Miss farrow’s class, but not more than a second or two before she resumed her speech and the rest of the class turned its gaze back to the front of the room.
At his desk in the back right corner, he pulled out a pocket knife, and continued with the work of carving away an intricate pattern into the wood. All the other desks were those new metal ones, he wasn't even sure where they had found a wooden desk or why it was here, it was probably the only thing in the school, besides the teachers, that was older than he was. He welcomed the distraction though, it had been the only thing keeping him sane for the past few months. In fact, he wasn't sure what he would do once there was no room left for carving. He tried not to think about it.
Most students would be thrilled to not have to worry about tests or grades, but they didn't realize how incredibly boring it was.
Skander looked up from his work for a moment, brushing the saw dust and flecks away. Miss Farrow was giving a lesson about some war, or president, or country. Once he had perfected the art of “tuning out”, it was hard to tune back in again even if he wanted to. anyway, there was a map on the wall that she was gesturing to. No one payed any attention to him as he whittled away at his masterpiece, not even when the entire class got up to do a demonstration. Everyone knew he was just there for show. He had participated some when he was younger, but it didn't take long to learn that it didn't make a difference. For a while he read books while everyone else engaged in the lesson, but now even that didn't interest him.
He focused in on the design. Long, slender vines twisted around the desk, forming a frame at the edge, and circling in towards the center. The design showed off different shades of brown, as the lighter layers of wood were uncovered.
He pressed the tip of the knife into the center and maneuvered it around on the outline he had made. The first cuts were always the hardest. You couldn't just jab it in, you had to use small, quick movements. It had to be little by little, and precise, in order to get the smooth curves and edges. It took a long time to get to that final image from the first slice. It could be a tedious process. Luckily though, time was something he had to spare, and he enjoyed watching the pictures unfold slowly. Some of the designs were planned, others he just made up as he went along. He could remember the days he was feeling anxious or moody, and those that seemed to flow by with a more tolerable air. He recognized his own moods in the lines of his work, jagged and forced, or smooth and effortless. The middle of the desk showed an outline of a bird with long splayed feathers. This was one of the designs he had planned, labored over even. He had mixed emotions about starting it. There was a sense of satisfaction and anticipation, but also disappointment, as he knew it signaled the beginning of the end.
A few strands of black hair fell over his eyes as he bent over the carving. He wondered if he should cut it. It was annoying to keep pushing it out of his face. He hated when things got in his way. He was just starting on the bird when he felt someone approaching.
Miss Farrow slid a paper onto the corner of his desk, careful not to disturb his work. He glanced at it for a moment. A completely blank test paper except for his name and a large red letter A. He blew another strand of hair out of his face and watched as the paper picked up the draft and fell to the floor.
Back to work. He had almost finished the beak when the door swung open and made him look up again inspite of himself.
Chapter One
15 years later...
Skander Malvado sat at the wobbly cafe table outside of “Aunt Edda’s Bakery”, stacking creamer cups into a tower and jabbing toothpicks on the top and sides. A white stream trickled onto the table from the crude miniature fountain. The girl at the next table, a blond that he recognized from school, glanced at the river of cream on the ground and followed it to the tip of Skandar’s black combat boots before quickly averting her gaze. Skander rolled his eyes and let the tiniest of smiles flash across his face. She looked at her watch and gathered her things together. He heard the bells from a block away, signaling the start of school. She could make it if she ran.
Skander watched for a few minutes, then knocked over the tower of creamer and got up without paying, leaving a half eaten sandwich and ten empty creamers in a puddle of white. The waitress scrambled to her feet, but didn't object to him skipping out on the check. She mopped up the mess and hurried to get out of his way, almost tripping over the chair as he stalked past.
He strode down the cobblestone on main street at a casual pace. They were the kind of stone that were made to look old, but were clearly very new with their perfectly rounded edges and shining finish. that’s the way most of the town was. He walked past mailboxes, houses, lawns, all glinting in the sun, showing off their brand new price tags. He often thought how strange it was for a street. a house, a town, to be the same age or younger than he was. When the town rebuilt after the storm, they had tried to replicate the old styles, but with all new materials and modern finishes, it looked more like a disneyland version rather than a restoration.
Fifteen years. It was as if every inch he grew, another brick was added. They had grown up together, he and Shadow Lakes. He could almost match his breath to the swaying of the freshly planted trees. The tops of which were barely taller than he was. That, and the fact that his mother was probably the most powerful person in town, it wasn’t surprising he felt above it all.
By the time he reached the school, the courtyard was empty and all of the hallways quiet. The principal was talking to a janitor as he rounded the corner to his first period class. Mr. Hardy was poised at the sound of footsteps, and got halfway through the word “hallpass” before seeing who it was. He quickly turned back toward the janitor and away from any possible eye contact. Skander never even slowed his step.
There was a brief moment of recognition when he opened the door to Miss farrow’s class, but not more than a second or two before she resumed her speech and the rest of the class turned its gaze back to the front of the room.
At his desk in the back right corner, he pulled out a pocket knife, and continued with the work of carving away an intricate pattern into the wood. All the other desks were those new metal ones, he wasn't even sure where they had found a wooden desk or why it was here, it was probably the only thing in the school, besides the teachers, that was older than he was. He welcomed the distraction though, it had been the only thing keeping him sane for the past few months. In fact, he wasn't sure what he would do once there was no room left for carving. He tried not to think about it.
Most students would be thrilled to not have to worry about tests or grades, but they didn't realize how incredibly boring it was.
Skander looked up from his work for a moment, brushing the saw dust and flecks away. Miss Farrow was giving a lesson about some war, or president, or country. Once he had perfected the art of “tuning out”, it was hard to tune back in again even if he wanted to. anyway, there was a map on the wall that she was gesturing to. No one payed any attention to him as he whittled away at his masterpiece, not even when the entire class got up to do a demonstration. Everyone knew he was just there for show. He had participated some when he was younger, but it didn't take long to learn that it didn't make a difference. For a while he read books while everyone else engaged in the lesson, but now even that didn't interest him.
He focused in on the design. Long, slender vines twisted around the desk, forming a frame at the edge, and circling in towards the center. The design showed off different shades of brown, as the lighter layers of wood were uncovered.
He pressed the tip of the knife into the center and maneuvered it around on the outline he had made. The first cuts were always the hardest. You couldn't just jab it in, you had to use small, quick movements. It had to be little by little, and precise, in order to get the smooth curves and edges. It took a long time to get to that final image from the first slice. It could be a tedious process. Luckily though, time was something he had to spare, and he enjoyed watching the pictures unfold slowly. Some of the designs were planned, others he just made up as he went along. He could remember the days he was feeling anxious or moody, and those that seemed to flow by with a more tolerable air. He recognized his own moods in the lines of his work, jagged and forced, or smooth and effortless. The middle of the desk showed an outline of a bird with long splayed feathers. This was one of the designs he had planned, labored over even. He had mixed emotions about starting it. There was a sense of satisfaction and anticipation, but also disappointment, as he knew it signaled the beginning of the end.
A few strands of black hair fell over his eyes as he bent over the carving. He wondered if he should cut it. It was annoying to keep pushing it out of his face. He hated when things got in his way. He was just starting on the bird when he felt someone approaching.
Miss Farrow slid a paper onto the corner of his desk, careful not to disturb his work. He glanced at it for a moment. A completely blank test paper except for his name and a large red letter A. He blew another strand of hair out of his face and watched as the paper picked up the draft and fell to the floor.
Back to work. He had almost finished the beak when the door swung open and made him look up again inspite of himself.
Author's log: This is less than half of what I wanted to have posted today! I had this grand plan of writing all day yesterday, but then Miles cut his hand on a piece of glass and I had to keep him home from school while I took him to the doctor (he's fine by the way). I got some good writing in this morning, but man was it a scramble! It serves me right for procrastinating. I'm glad I was at least able to have something though. Here's hoping I can learn from my mistakes and be a little more conscientious of my deadline for next week! Chapter one continued next time where you will find out who comes through the door...dun dun DUN! If I get ambitious I may do a mid-week post to get myself back on track, but Friday is the hard deadline. Have a great weekend everyone. What do you think of Skander?
Friday, April 5, 2013
Fiction Friday!: Prologue
Prologue
The day the rain finally stopped, the people of the town cautiously made their way back to see what was left of their homes. It was like pulling back the curtain of time, the first settlers discovering a new land not yet inhabited, a town that did not yet exist. Except instead of possibility, these pilgrims saw only loss. As they stumbled through the rubble, entire houses were lifted off their foundations. Pipes stuck up from the ground like some strange stem without a blossom. Not one memento, not even a broken chair or a shattered picture frame could be salvaged. It was as if the houses had been swept up into the sky, still intact, and plopped down somewhere else.
The only thing left standing, was the house at the top of the hill. As onlookers grieved and cried in the places that their own houses once stood, slowly they shifted their gaze upward, in amazement and dread, to the otherwise ordinary looking two story Victorian. Not only was it standing, it looked as if the hurricane had deliberately tip-toed around it. Every shutter, every windowpane, was precisely the way it had been, polished and perfect. Even the flowers in the window boxes remained vibrant and rigid against the storm. The house seemed to gleam, as if having just cooled off in a summer shower instead of the worst storm in the history of Shadow Lakes. The people shuddered at the pristine gables.
The rebuild was slow. Some people started over from scratch. Others cut their losses and headed off to a new town, one that wasn't haunted by the ghosts of loss. Meanwhile, the house at the top of the hill cast a looming shadow on the devastated town. It sneered at their efforts and malevolently mocked them with it’s perfectly sculpted bushes. It is not hard to see how all of the rumors began-- cursed, haunted, terrible secrets cloaked behind it’s mysterious walls.
Despite this, the people were resilient, and the town returned to a semblance of it’s former glory. After a while, things settled into normalcy. Lives went on, and over the years they began to forget the destruction of that day, or at least keep it as a memory in the distant past. For after things go well for so long, you start to believe that they will stay that way.
Author Notes: NaNoWriMo-ing in April is hard! I don't know if it's because I'm used to gloomy November, the rain and cold making it perfectly suited to being hold up inside with my computer/pen and paper, or if it's because I'm trying to edit a previous work instead of write a new one. Perhaps it's a little of both. Already, I am nowhere near on track for my word goal...I have barely even been counting. My new goal is to at least keep my promise to post a section here every Friday, I'm shooting for one chapter a week.
Happy April everyone, it's going to be busy!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)